Most people complain about the ridiculous measure of remakes and reboots modern movies in the last decade, but they always overlook another of the classic annoyances: the sequel. There have been hundreds of movies that have had sub-par or downright god-awful ones that some people go so far as to forget they exist (I’m looking at you, Matrix sequel denialists). However, there are some that you watch and you hope that someday, someone with a last name not Lucas will come and continue the story.
This one was a no-brainer. Brad Bird hit every right note for making a superhero movie without having to deal with all the bad acting (I’m looking at you, Ben Affleck and Matthew Goode) and crappy special effects ( ahem, Hulk) you get in a lot of the live action ones. What really gets me about it is that a sequel to this movie could really play up the dysfunction that would exist in a family as complicated as this one, especially with an older Jack-Jack going through puberty with all those powers he showed us in Jack-Jack Attack. Just make sure to have Sam Jackson back for it, I know he’s busy with other superhero work now, but Frozone is still definitely needed.
A Jack Burton Sequel
So yes, Kurt Russell is bit older now and yes John Carpenter really isn’t really making as many greats as he used to, but Big Trouble In Little China is a masterpiece of B-movie proportions, and with the slew of movies made in that genre in the last ten years, you might as well bring back one of the kings. The reason why I say a Jack Burton sequel over a Big Trouble In Little China one is that, despite being pretty useless as a character in a lot of scenes, he completely dominates that movie and I think with his trucker mentality it makes sense to have him on a different adventure to begin with. Russell’s age shouldn’t be much of an issue either (it didn’t stop Spielberg and Lucas from dragging Harrison Ford in an A-bombed out fridge coffin) so I don’t see why it would be much of a stretch to get him to put on the tank top, get a good knife, and start the good fight against the supernatural again.
While on the topic of Harrison Ford, I know I’m pissing off a lot of fans by even thinking of continuing the Hamlet of sci-fi, but I think it’s doable , if put in the right hands. I seriously don’t think that’s Ridley Scott anymore, what with his constant jock-riding of Russell Crowe and recent string of lackluster movies, but he is going back to roots with an Alien prequel, so maybe he should do the same and go back to a time when men were replicants and Rutger Hauer was not yet a highly armed homeless guy. The best option would be to combine some of the old with the new, which in this case could mean mixing the noir cyberpunk paranoia with some Neill Blomkamp written oppression against other androids as Deckard and Rachel continue their run.
Ewan McGregor, stop being a douche already. Everyone else wants to make the film adaptation to Irving Welsh’s Porno. The original’s director Danny Boyle is on board, and Robert Carlyle is chomping at the bit to play the psychotic Francis Begbie again, and I’m sure Jonny Lee Miller, Ewen Bremmer, and Kelly Macdonald would be down for another degenerate romp through Scotland. So you didn’t get the part in The Beach that Boyle wanted for you and went to Leo DiCaprio instead. That’s OK, the movie sucked anyway, you weren’t missing much. C’mon, go and make a movie that will make you forget you were on this one, or that one, or good lord this one.
Looking at Luc Besson’s recent and upcoming projects on IMDB tell me that he clearly still has a thing for super hot and strong women. Hell, we still have a thing for them, as the CW is giving his Nikita another go-around on television soon. That being said, the idea of seeing Natalie Portman doing all the parkour running, getaway-driving, particular-set-of-skills badassery Besson has been giving us as a writer in other movies since the original 1994 movie should be enough to get some fans interested. It would be cool to have another unknown child actor to play opposite her, maybe a little boy this time just to switch it up, and although we don’t have Gary Oldman available as a villain for a sequel, perhaps a guy like Christoph Waltz or Ralph Fiennes can step in and bring on the crazy.
The Fifth Element
The Adventures of Buckaroo Banzai Across the 8th Dimension
The Chronicles of Riddick
Back to the Future
My Cousin Vinny